S-A-R-C-A-S-M RULES

This I have to admit, I am a pretty sarcastic guy at times. I enjoy it, yeah, go ahead and call me a "weirdo" for that, but you are not going to take away this small joy from me..he he! I have a nice collection of sarcastic quotes which I have collected for [s]months[/s] some time now! Here is the first installment, 25 of them all! I bet if you are someone who reads my blog, you will enjoy them.

1. "Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some abuse the privilege." – Anonymous
2. "Eat well, stay fit, and die anyway." – Anonymous
3. Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.
- Ashleigh Brilliant
4. I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here.
- Stephen Bishop
5. I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
6. The United States is a nation of laws: badly written and randomly enforced.
- Frank Zappa
7. The 100% American is 99% idiot.
8. The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.
- George Bernard Shaw
9. He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.
- Oscar Wilde
10. He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.
- Victor Borge
11. I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
- Mark Twain
12. If you ever become a mother, can I have one of the puppies?
- Charles Pierce
13. I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
14. Sarcasm helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them.
15. I’m smiling. This should scare you.
16. Nothing is more discouraging than unappreciated sarcasm.
17. If you’re one in a million, there are six thousand people exactly like you.
18. I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
19. A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
20. I’m not sure what’s wrong… But it’s probably your fault.
21. This place is so weird that the cockroaches have moved next door.
22. The world will end tomorrow (unless postponed by rain).
23. I never admit or deny anything it makes me more interesting.
24. Whatever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much. You’re not that good.
25. A patriot must always be ready to defend his country against his government.
-- Edward Abbey